This week I’ve heard several people say the same thing: “I just woke up feeling stiff.”

Maybe that’s true for you. Perhaps you’ve got a painful back. Maybe you’re feeling anxious about something? For the musicians amongst you, perhaps an upcoming performance. Maybe you’ve just got too many decisions to make.

Whatever it is, our instinct is usually the same. We try to change the thing that’s bothering us.

But what if that’s not the best place to start?

We often treat these as separate problems—a stiff back, anxious thoughts, difficult breathing, feeling overwhelmed. But they’re rarely isolated. They’re usually part of a larger pattern in how we’re organising ourselves.

Sometimes the neck becomes easier when the ribs move differently. Breathing changes when the pelvis and pelvic floor becomes more responsive. We’ve been exploring that in the last few weeks. Sometimes anxiety softens when you stop trying to get rid of it and instead become curious about how you’re creating it. Decisions often become easier when we feel calmer.

So what if instead of rushing to fix it, we get curious about the bigger pattern?

They’re not separate after all. Whenever we’re anxious, excited or frustrated, we don’t just think differently. We breathe differently, organise ourselves differently and move differently too. Every experience involves the same ingredients: our thoughts, emotions, sensations and movements.

We also amplify emotions through our physical expression without realising it. The way we breathe, hold ourselves and move can quietly turn the volume up. The good news is that those same connections can help settle our nervous system down. The first step is learning to recognise the patterns.

Today, when something feels difficult, pause for a moment before trying to change it. Ask yourself: What else is happening at the same time? Has your breathing changed? Your jaw? Your shoulders? Your thoughts? Don’t start by trying to fix any of it. Start by noticing, and wondering if it belongs to a bigger pattern. Then if it’s possible, see what you can let go of, simply with this change in your awareness. Once we know what we’re doing, it’s often easier to stop doing quite so much of it.